Love and Marriage...
'DAYS before my 55th birthday, I found myself a single man again,' says Jim Paterson, now 61, and two months into grandfatherhood. 'My first marriage had broken down in 1989 and a long-term relationship had come to an end in March 2002.'
The managing director of a steel stockholding company already had a grown-up family - 28 year old son Graeme and 31 year old daughter Leanne - and enjoyed the freedom of being single again, but it did have its drawbacks. 'Loneliness was a major factor,' he says. 'I also found it incredibly difficult to visit a restaurant or bar by myself. I felt self-conscious and gave this up. I didn't relish the idea of remaining on my own for the rest of my life, but I had no clue how to meet other people.'
A relative mentioned the Raeburn Supper Club, and although initially reluctant - 'I was put off by the name; isn't Rayburn a cooker?' - he eventually agreed to be interviewed to join in September 2002.
The Glasgow-based club works on the principle of bringing single people together once a month in a no-pressure environment, which suited Paterson. 'You turn up and there are maybe 20 or 30 of you. You have a meal in a restaurant and you get to meet people you don't know. Then, if you wish, you just say, 'See you guys later' and off you go. There is none of this face-to-face pressure where you always have to have a conversation going.'
Then, one night in November, he met up with the group, as usual. 'I was more or less the last person in the restaurant,' he says. 'There was only one spare seat, and it was right across from Cindy.'
Cindy was a widow and the two hit it off immediately. 'We got on really well,' he says. 'She was beautiful with long, blond, wavy hair and had a great personality. It has been a fairy tale for us.'
The couple married in May 2006, to the delight of their children (Cindy has a 27 year old daughter, Caroline). The family - including his granddaughter Isla and Cindy's mother and father - are going on holiday to Spain next summer. 'Cindy's parents have been great with me,' says Paterson.
He continues, 'I've said to a few folk that I wish I'd met Cindy when I was younger, but that wasn't possible. I'm just very lucky that I've met her now.'
Visit www.raeburnsupperclub.com for more details on Raeburn Supper Club.
Written by Ruth Walker, Spectrum Magazine, Scotland on Sunday - October 26, 2008.